WOW – Accepting everything you are, and aren’t… Then that is when you will truly succeed! Now that hits home for me! I honestly think that we can all take away something from this message – in whatever way we want to look at it – be it sobriety, or other lifestyle and health choices. The path we choose will be ours to own and I am owning mine.
I had another tough day today – dealing with huge financial stressers and trying to figure out how to work through them and then dealing with my 12 year old (more self-harm and being out without letting me know where she was, and more talk about issues at school which I’ll have to deal with tomorrow).
I felt like drinking but I didn’t and the craving came and went without a fight because I’m not counting anymore but rather ‘balancing’ things. I am accepting who I truly am and who I am not. I am not that person who can achieve what YOU can. I am on my own path of discovery and perhaps figuring out like a new explorer – ways of tackling this issue differently.
I know many will say – but your previous blogs and statements (heck even I look back on some blogs and wonder lol) … you are contradicting yourself or fooling yourself, but I truly believe that I’m on a different plane if you will. Travelling towards the same destiny but taking a different route. Mapping my way through some rough times by navigating with different tools and resources.
I am looking forward to tomorrow’s doctor’s appointment to address some possible physical issues that have been affecting my ‘spirit’ and mood. I also hope to address the pain I’ve been experiencing in my joints so that I can get back into a regular exercise routine. I also wonder about figuring out my whole hormonal shifts in all of this too. Hopefully the blood work will give me some answers.
So I’m closing off another day – while tough and challenging on some fronts – successful in managing and coping without the aid of booze, but rather turning to my writing for solace. Thanks for listening.